_Sadness.

Unbearable, wretched, bone-crushing sadness.

She hates it. Hates herself for letting it take over, but there's nothing she can do. It comes in waves, crashing over her, drowning her.

&& when she's not sad, she's angry. More angry than she can ever remember being. She wants to burn the world, make them understand how she feels. She wants to scream, and rage, and destroy everything. She wants to destroy herself. She's pulling away from everything and everyone she knows. She sees it all happening, but can't do anything to stop it.

But mostly, she's sad. Mostly, she cries. She has nightmares and panic attacks, and shakes for no real reason.

Mostly, she just wants her Daddy back.